Qwertyopolis 1.1

Cavalry?

hmmm...

*jumps off a cliff*
*pulls a cord and a parachute comes out*
*looks up and sees that the parachute is ripped*

Oh.......................... no.

Rotaretilbo wrote:*sighs at the antics of others*

"They may try a cavalry charge yet. Have we prepared the field?"

all epuip spears and get into a phalanx!!!

"I'll prepare the torches. We'll eat well this night if they do try a cavalry charge."

I'll keep watch.
*Spots a small Persian patrol*
Uh, Rot?

*takes the spears of dead spartans and makes pungy traps for persian cavalry to fall on*

Ok trap are set, oh the next wave is going to be fun

*wakes up to see myself bound by brutes and persian guards*
well this is just perfect.
*is being walked away from battle*
WERE ARE YOU TAKEING ME??????
*Brute drops boulder on head again knocking me out*

Okay, fairly well outcome, no deaths, nate is still alive and.... a-.. oh damn, we lost grz...

*sees that rot is preparing brute to eat*

Srsly? O fine..

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

*ends up landing on the brute that's dragging rzg*

Well hai there rzg!

*goes unconscious from fall... and to add more drama *

*My Brutes stare at Rot in disbelief*
Guys! Calm down! We all like to eat our enemies, right?
*Sees persian/Brute army in the distance*
Fuck it... Guys, prepare for battle.

Noc stop your conspiring! Sit down and eat your bretheren already, its getting cold...

*pokes food with fork, puts some in mouth*

MMMMmmm... dis doshn't thaste thoo bhaad yhoou ghuys!

*Rips apart some Persian's stomach and eats it*
Hey, Jakra, want some?
*hands the liver to my 2nd in command*

Qwerty said there are no persians! The brutes are the persians in this scenario...

And is your second in command still a youngling? He doesn't have his -us suffix

*gobbles up some more brute*

When did he say that?
Oh, sorry. I meant Jakraus.

look back at page 19 I think, or 20..

Oh. I see. Well, I'm not eating my Brutes, at least.

*stuffs mouth full of more brute*

I wish I had my weaponry....
*Picks up spear and puts a rock on it, using tent lace to create a primitive Gravity Hammer*

*Sun begins to rise*
Guys, are you ready?

im always ready*waits for the battle*

CHAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRGGGGGGGEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*watches Noc charge brutes with his own pack off brutes*

*thinks that he will be easily overrun*

Ill stay here, next to the fire, with my plate of brute, and wait for their monkey asses to come here.

*Kills 40 Brutes*
RETREAT!
*comes back*
Hey Guaz!

*gives up on anyone else actually having any historical knowledge of the battle of Thermopolae*

"Alright, Spartans, let's dig a trap pit just in front of the main line. Then we can fill it with the weapons of our dead enemies. It should be ten feet wide and span the entire pass."

There was a battle on a thermostat?

Weird.

Musta been one hot fight! Zing!

Rotaretilbo wrote:*gives up on anyone else actually having any historical knowledge of the battle of Thermopolae*

"Alright, Spartans, let's dig a trap pit just in front of the main line. Then we can fill it with the weapons of our dead enemies. It should be ten feet wide and span the entire pass."

*only knows that th greek fleet helped greatly with the battle and that the most of th greeks left to athens while the rest of 300spartans and 1200 greeks fought to the death*