Disaster at Iosuun

not much has been completed, but I was wondering if people could review what has been done and see what problems there are, etc.

On Iosuun: Reports from the disaster on Iosuun---------------------------------------------------------------

Report from ONI Operative Alan Gudey
<Shortened Version of report>

EYES ONLY
TOP SECRET

June 7, 2509

What happened at Iosuun cannot be easily explained. It is unknown to anyone at the time of this writing what had occured over the course of the five days in question, other than that the lush colony of two million was transformed from a perfect example of a succesfull colony to a world with half of its landmass devastated. As I arrived after the time fo the happening, I cannot give any facts about what transpired over those five days other than the testimony of the survivors placed after my report.

To try and keep this report as clean as possible, it has been written in order of my experiences there from first to last. I arrived at the colony of Iosuun on May 21st of this year. I was sent by the Office of Naval Intelligence to discover and report what had caused the loss of comminication eight days prior. I set out the day communication was lost with a small expeditionary force and a transport fleet of three Frigates, the Sunder, Talon and Tabbadon, and a single transpost ship, the Chariot, loaded with a small Army detatchment of five-hundred men from one of the local garrisons, expecting a URF uprising.

When we arrived, both of the major cities were in ashes and the entire Northern Hemisphere of the planet was a blackened wasteland. Upon landing near the remains of Port Hope, we discovered a camp of two-thousand or so, among which was a person of interest; an Army Leuitenant.


To date, Leeroy was the only one who would speak. Many of the survivors were found caged up by their peers, gnawing at their own flesh. As of now, the survivors are still on the planet, but are now in the care of the expeditionary force.

[Details removed to shorten report, can be found in lengthened version]

Overall, at the current moment it is impossible to determine what happened at Iosuun. It is beyond our understanding what happened there over the course of those five days, and a second investigation into the matter is recomended ASAP to discover what had occured.

kewl

are the men zombies because it would be good like the ones that can run fast and scream...

It's spelled much, not mych.

Other than that, no problems. Can't wait to see the rest ^_^

...seems....physcotic..*sp*

I like it so far. It's interesting.

As for errors, I'll list what I found.
1. "Testimony of Army Leuitenant Leeroy Harper" 'Leuitenant' should be 'Lieutenant'.
2. "mych of his testimony" As capn qwerty said, it's spelt 'much'.

It's good so far, I'm looking forward to seeing where it goes from here. Keep it up.

That was a quick type up, I didn't pay much attention to spelling.
Its likely to change some, and a longer version fo the report will be in the story, but its placement within it is yet to be determined

And there are not zombies, it will be explained to you by the report or by the eye witness account(ahem, the main storyline itself), its just a matter of which comes first.

The story is also being set up for other writers to add their own stories to it fromt eh perspective of other people, which is allowed so long as it does not conflict with an existing story.

Not much attention to spelling, eh? I can't wait to read it when you do pay attention to spelling.

Yes, create suspense and get your readers even more interested. Good move, seriously.

Is that so? As the story develops, I just may contribute.

That was a just a quickwrite like I said, it's a rough draft as of now

Exactly

So long as the stories do not contradict any other stories and go against the setting they will be put in. As of now, I have the main story planned out as a series of Flashbacks and Interrogations.

Sounds good. I thought that that would be how you'd write it. I haven't seen any other stories done this way, it should be interesting.

Roughly based on The Warp in The West from The Elder Scrolls Series, the style the plot is conveyed that is

Okay. I've never read it.

seath i said it would be KEWL i know they are not but it could quickly be changed into zombies for e do not yet know what is causing them to go rouge...